It was a nice service, and a small but loyal and loving crowd of attendees. My brother T. spoke the eulogy, and then invited people to come and share stories about my dad. I learned a couple of new things, and had to smile at a few, as I knew them already, and I knew the backstory...
1) My dad loved golf. uhmm yah. When possible and there were enough people around, it was not unknown for him to play a round in the morning, another in the afternoon, and if there were a group that needed a 4th, he'd go along and play another in the evening. That's not to say that he was a great golfer. Though, he did have his moments. Unfortunately for him, none of his children shared his passion of the game. I remember the day, when I was just turned 18 and we'd just moved to the little town he'd live in for the next 27 years, when he came bounding in (well-- bounding for my dad) and triumphantly announcing to his five children: "I've just broken 100!". We all looked at him kinda blankly and finally one of us said: "Uhmm Dad, that's GOOD, right?".
2. My dad loved to play dominos. And he'd cheat. And he'd get away with it.
heheheheh. We learned real early to check my dad's shirt pocket for quarters when he came home from work. It was our icecream money. For all five of us. You'd have thought nuclear engineers and reactor operators would be smart enough NOT to play my daddy for money. Some people are slow learners. Thank goodness, 'cause my mom knew better to give my dad much pocket money, as he was also the softest touch for a loan or icecream money in the state. I'm just say'n.
3. My dad often was quiet during parties or gatherings. When he broke his silence it was usually to punctuate the evening with a very well timed one liner. He was a patient man....and very smart.
4. My dad grew up poor. Not just dirt poor, not "sharecropper" poor.... I'm talking migrant field worker poor. He went to seven different schools the first year he was in first grade. He'd gotten "held back" because he'd just plain not had enough days in school that year. Afterwards, he'd say that when he'd go to a new school or got a new teacher, he'd go in the classroom and put his feet up on the desk in front of him. He'd wait. Sure enough, the teacher would come in and say "YOU! Get your feet off that desk! What, WERE YOU BORN IN A BARN?" And he'd answer, quite truthfully, "Yes m'am, I was." And he was. Born in a barn in Belton, Texas in 1934. Well...the tack room really. The rest of the family was in the barn, sleeping in the hay as a midwife called by the barn's owner caught my dad.
5. He was smart. Ohhh yes. (see #3) And from the beginning of high school or before, he'd been determined to go to college. Not the usual dream of a poor kid. They'd moved up in the world, a little, after WWII, as my grandfather'd been a C.B. (See Bee- part of the "construction battalion" who built runways on coral reefs. My grandpa went grey over the space of three days when he and a few other men'd been trapped and were huddling in a hole in the ground trying to survive the Japanese bombing them) and thus, having gotten a little experience in running a bull dozer, he was hired on to build roads. My dad wanted to go to college, and he needed college preparation courses. In order to get the math credits he needed, he had to teach a Trigonometry class just to get credit for having TOOK the class. He had a photographic memory.
6. He was a patient and loving father. My mom did most of the yelling when yelling needed to be done. Hey. There were FIVE of us kids. Yelling was needed. Once, my mom told me that "You just wait till your father gets home! He's going to SPANK you!" Well, I hadn't done whatever it was that I was going to get spanked for... at least, that's the way I remember it. I do remember though, how my dad talked to me about it, and decided that I didn't really need a spanking. However, my dad, being a smart man (see #3 and #5) knew that something had to be done to cool my simmering mom down a bit. So, he told me that he was going to slap his thigh, and I was to yell as loud as I could. I did. And it worked. We kept that secret for many years.
My dad was patient with all the kids in our neighborhood. My mom tells the story that she woke up one Saturday afternoon, (she worked 11 pm to 7 am as a nurse) and came into the kitchen just to find my dad surrounded by a bunch of kids and making a largish batch of popcorn balls. It only surprised her because she noticed that none of the kids were HERS. I mentioned before, my dad was a soft touch for a treat.
I have a few more, but I think I'll save them for a future post or three.
Y'all. Have a bowl of popcorn and watch a game (doesn't matter what sport, but golf would be nice) and think of my dad. Those of you who indulge, crack a beer at the same time. Lone Star Beer is recommended.